We live in a society where people date, breakup and repeat that cycle regularly. Don't tell me that you haven't seen people change their relationship on Facebook almost on a weekly basis; I've been that person several times. So I thought I'd take a minute and share what I consider important in a relationship. Sure, it's great if a guy is super good looking with a great body, but there is SO much more involved:
#1 Good communication - This is always first priority in my relationships. Without being able to sit down with the other person and tell them what you're feeling and what's on your mind, eventually all of your feelings will just bottle up and things generally won't end well. I'm not saying to pick a fight over every little thing, but it's crucial for both you and your partner to know how to talk about important things and come to an agreement on them. Also, make sure that you can talk AND listen. It's important to be able to see both sides. Keep in mind if you're really mad maybe you should count to ten first.....or a hundred.
#2 Trust - If you don't trust each other something is wrong. Sometimes gut feelings are right - sometimes they aren't. I had a friend tell me once that she trusts people until she has a reason not to. Hmmm, I can see the benefit as long as you aren't too naive. If there are red flags like not wanting to spend time together or hiding his phone when he's texting; that should definitely be taken seriously. Bottom line is if there's no trust in your relationship, you should probably walk away.
#3 Honesty - This seems like a no brainer to me. It's also one of those things that's generally found out the hard way. When he says he's had a rough week and he's going to bed early and then you see him out with his friends, you should probably call things quits. If he can justify lying to you about little things, then you can bet that he'll lie to you about important things.
#4 Fairness - Who makes the decisions on where you're going to eat, or what you're going to do? It's important to have some give and take. If one person is always getting their own way it's only a matter of time before the other person feels cheated or like they aren't getting a say in any of the decisions.
#5 Separate Identity - It's so nice to spend time together, right? But it's also important to not fall off the face of the earth when you get in a relationship. It's important for a girl to have a girls night and for a guy to have a guys night. Also, don't skip all those things that were always important to you, like your hobbies and interests.
Believe me, I'm far from an expert. But I firmly believe that these are some core necessities in a healthy relationship.
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